The Secret to Stop Finding Yourself in That Soulless, Sexless, Unfulfilling Relationship.
Are you're tired repeating the same pattern over and over again? Being stuck in, or getting over the heartache of another soulless, sexless, unfulfilling relationship. One that just 'keeps happening' to you!
It started so well. You were perfect for each other. You felt like you had found the other half of your soul. He/She completed you. And now, you're on your knees, sobbing, every cell of your being is hurting. It's consuming you. You feel anger, sadness, rage. The same words keep running through your mind...
Why does this keep happening to me?
Why am I in the situation AGAIN?
How have I ended up in this damaging relationship, when I went through so much pain and discomfort the last time, I thought I had learnt my lesson?
Does this sound familiar to you?
I bet the thought has crossed your mind. 'If only they had treated me differently, understood me, loved me more. If only I could have changed the way they saw things.'
Stop right there!
The only reason you are there again is because you asked for that very relationship. You're there again because of YOU.
They couldn't have loved you more, because you didn't love yourself more. They couldn't have treated you better, because you didn't think you were worthy of being treated better.
Understanding that our experiences are entirely our own responsibility and no one else's will begin the path to healing these patterns. When we stop expecting others to fit into the defined roles that we have placed on them, we won't lash out in anger or experience the excruciating pain inside when they don't meet the conditional needs that we hope of them in that role.
If you haven't already shut your laptop in anger or clicked off this post in haste... give me a moment to awaken your heart and mind to the core of what is happening within your mental, emotional, and energetic being which is creating these patterns to repeat themselves over and over again.
You might be surprised to hear me say that we are going to talk about our ego, our DNA and our cellular memory.
We hear a lot about the ego in the self-help, soul awakening times that we live in. You may hear that the ego is your worst enemy, that it needs to be suppressed, forgotten or even killed. That it is the root of our problems, the very thing that holds us back and keeps us from living the life we are meant to live.
Yes in part these statements hold some truth.
But in all fairness without our ego, we wouldn't be able to judge or navigate specific experiences, situations or circumstances during our mortal experience on this planet.
Our ego, in fact, plays the significant role of protecting us!
It helps us to scan and react to any given situation that we enter into in an instant. It examines our bodies for any stored cellular memories or DNA that tells it that we have been in a similar situation before and then it acts accordingly to help guide us through that situation. Where it gets a little deep is that these situations are not only those we have experienced in this lifetime. These could be experiences that we have carried from our mothers and grandmothers. A little lesson in biology. We are an egg inside our mother at the very time she is a growing fetus inside our grandmother. So literally we are carrying the DNA or the wounding that our grandmothers experienced in their lifetime. Not only this but these experiences can be stored from past lifetimes as well (of course this depends on your beliefs).
If the ego flags up that we have been in a similar hurtful, harmful, damaging or life-threatening situation, it will try to protect us from being hurt again.
These defences may throw up feelings of fear, self-doubt, or unworthiness. They may create thoughts or self-limiting beliefs that literally stop us from entering into something which appears to be damaging to us in some way. We could even make up a million reasons why we can't do something... lack of experience, time, finances, not being able to be that person or give that amount of energy to something or someone.
The ego will literally do anything and everything to protect you from being hurt again.
And so, if we continue to resonate at the same energetic frequency, react in the same way as we always have, we will continue to attract the same experiences, people, situations into our life until we have learnt our lesson.
This is your opportunity to see things with a different perspective.
The reason we encounter these relationships and hurtful situations are because of what we have stored in our cellular memory and in our DNA. Just like we know that our physical body is in a continual process of homeostasis (body temperature being a good example; when we're hot our body works by sweating to cool us down, when we're cold we shake to warm ourselves up). Our soul too is in this continual process of creating equilibrium. Our soul is always seeking ways to help us to reach higher, to experience life differently, to bring us into wholeness and alignment with our health, our truth and our bliss. It is trying with all it has to release the patterns that are hidden and suppressed within our energetic bodies.
How does it do this?
It uses the law of attraction. It magnetises people and situations into our lives that will trigger us, that will bring up the same story and pattern to give us the opportunity to release it.
Do you find yourself attracting the same kind of man or women into your life? Do you continue to attract the wounded, be it in your relationships or friendships?
If you can take a step back and look at the reason why this is happening you can see the beauty and the gift that it is offering you. You can see that it is the perfect opportunity for you to clear and release this stored energy and these patterns.
This is your opportunity to make a conscious choice to look at yourself rather than blaming your partner or the circumstance for the problem. This is your opportunity to go deep within and do the soul work... YOUR soul work. To create a deep sense of self-love and self-worth. To work on shifting the subconscious and conscious patterns sorted within your DNA and cellular memories. When you do, your ego will no longer be able to limit you. It will scan your body for a memory, and it will find nothing. So you will begin to move and experience life at a higher vibration. You will start to attract people, situations and experiences into your life that meet you at this new level of consciousness and being.
There are many ways in which we can start this journey, each soul calls deep unto deep in different ways. It is for your soul to guide you through this process of healing and enlightenment. Once you become conscious and aware that you are part of something so much bigger than what you had ever imagined. You can tune into this frequency and allow the magic of the energy to move through you and your life. When you understand what is available to you and the shifts that you need to make to move through your current beliefs and situations, you can call upon Divine guidance to help and guide you to the next step.
This is not an overnight miracle cure to manifest or carve out the perfect YOU or relationship, this is an ongoing commitment. It is the path of those that are looking to transform their reality. The likelihood is that it may even take you to some deep, dark, scary places. But I can assure you, it is within the darkness that the truth of who we are can be found.
I guide men and women to heal and awaken these parts of themselves through the powers of intimacy and sexuality. Tuning into the essence of life itself, creating profound intimate connections with themselves and others, offers the gift of healing wounds and separation, awakening our hearts and reclaiming our true essence and power.